Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
