Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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