So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
