I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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