i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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