I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
