i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Actions speak louder than pants.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
