I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
