i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Randomize
