you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
