we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
