i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
