I'm so fucking centered right now
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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