we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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