but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize