well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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