well I can't set my house on fire every night
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
