I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
