Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
