Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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