Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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