these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
