I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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