whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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