is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
