Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Randomize
