I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
