id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize