Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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