You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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