ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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