When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
