Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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