if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
