Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It was confusing and full of hummus
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
