I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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