I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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