If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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