but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
