Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
