We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
