too bad you live with your parents still
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
