He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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