Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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