dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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