my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize