i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i wish my penis had a tongue
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Randomize
