God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize