Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
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