do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
