So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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