weddingsv make me drug and hornr
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
