I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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